New blog

So this is probably going to be my new blog. Cause I was raging on my other one and then my parents found out and read it so I had to stop. :( this one I'll probably be more honest on because I'm 95% sure no one I care about will read this. :)

So… things that have been on my mind of late… Briana and Kristianna mostly. :P Briana, because… yeah, I kinda like her and sometimes I feel like she might like me and other times like she hates me. Its quite confusing and troublesome. And Kristianna, cause I feel like my friendship with her is thinning, and I know it's my fault. Why, my nonexistent reader might ask? Because for some stupid reason seeing her and Jordan makes me jealous, and kinda hurts me. And I feel at times like she's stopped caring about me, and ignored my silent cries for help over twitter. Though if I think about it, I kinda realize that that's my fault too cause I struggle with being open to people, and expressing myself. So when she's tried in the past I struggled with accepting it, and no she sees no point in trying. But it still hurts. And I'm still a baby. And the reason our friendship is thinner is because I've drawn away selfishly to protect myself (an it hasn't worked) twice. And then I choose to stop and rebuild the friendship, but it can't be as strong as before. And now that I recognize the consequences of my actions, I know I'll regret it for the rest of my life, and I think I'd rather suffer more pain to protect what's left of this rather than risk loosing it entirely. That's what's been on my mind lately(partly, not all of what's been in my mind I'll talk about)

Holy crap. That felt so good to get out in complete honesty :) more honest rages will happen my good reader of one :) (that's me :))